Oh... You Really Thought I Was Playin. Nope.

Mama might've raised me to be polite and respectful, but mama aint raise no fool.  And grandmama told me, "if you aint worried about your money, then you don't have any."  I do not fool with my money.  I'm going to need the people I work with on Sundays to get the memo.

I Owe You Nothing

So, tonight, Dallas THE BARBACK stepped up again, only this time, he didn't end up taking that much from me.  It still slows the whole process down when I have to input his totals, but I've gotten better at judging when to speed up and slow down my personal movements so I can control the flow of cash at the bar.  Tonight though, he started getting mad.  He made one customer a drink that she had originally asked me for and she tried to tip me instead of him anyway. 

As she handed the money to him he said, "my jar is over here."

She rolled her eyes and said, "I'm trying to tip her."

He got all indignant and she split the tips about 70/30 in my favor.

Then, there was another customer, who gave me a $10 earlier on in the night and said, "just take care of me and my boys whenever we come up here."  (And he was cute, so I was happy to do so.).  There came a point in time where I was really busy, though, and he tried to wait for me but Dallas got to him first.  After he paid for his drink, he went to my bucket to tip me.

I wasn't trying to hear Dallas's mouth, so before the customer put anything in my bucket, I told him, "you can tip him over there."

He shook his head and motioned to my bucket.  He dropped about $3-$4 in there.

Being nice, I gave $1 to Dallas, who then said, "he dropped more than $1 in there."

"I told him to tip you, but he said he wanted to tip me."

Negro, I owe you NOTHING.  I was being NICE giving you a dollar.  It's the CUSTOMER'S choice if they tip, how much they tip, and who they tip.  If a customer doesn't tip me I can get mad all I want to, but it remains THEIR money to do with what THEY want.  Once that man dropped the money in MY bucket because that's where he WANTED to drop it, it became MY money to do with as I so choose.  I OWE YOU NOTHING.

I saw him gettin mad over in his little corner throughout the whole night because customers kept tipping me for conversation/no real reason.  Yeah, that's right.  Be mad about it.  He got petty and told our manager that I broke a glass (something that happens regularly behind the bar no matter who's back there) in retaliation.  Whatever.

Is This Really A Matter of Dire Importance?  Really?

Big Sis, my Sunday manager, can be really OD.  Even when we have $1,300 in singles behind the bar with NO ONE in the club, she sends me or Dallas upstairs to get more.  Tonight, at 9:30, after I was only able to reclaim $20 in singles,  she even said, "if [the dancers] don't start turning 'em in, I'm gonna stop givin 'em out."

Lady!  We are not about to run out of singles any time soon... chill.

After Dallas told her that I broke a glass (he went upstairs without my knowledge when she was on break, specifically to tell her this [breaking a glass usually doesn't require an announcement]; what a bitchassed move), without a preface she came up to me and asked me, "you went to bartending school, right?"

"Yes," I replied.

"So you know not to scoop out the ice with the glass, right?  Use the scoop.  Don't do that."

OMG!  Everyone behind the bar does it at one point or another, especially when they're making two drinks at once, because we only have one ice scoop.  There's plenty of shit I learned in bartending school that isn't applied at The Club, including some shit SHE does.  She just likes to give people directions.

Oh!  And there was a mixup with one of the dancers turning in her singles.  She had $120 in total, but Dallas confused me as he handed it to me, such that I thought it was $140.  When I let my manager know, she said, "you'd better go get that money."

The dancer was on stage!  How the hell am I gonna go get money from her while she's dancing?  Besides, it's not like I'm about to let her leave without paying it back.  And in the time she told me to go get the money, I was supposed to be "ringing up" a fake drink a customer "bought" me worth $13.50.  Trick!  You just cost me $13.50 worth of tip money.  I should've made $153.50 tonight instead of the $143 that I counted up.  

Her complete and utter unchillness cost me actual money.  BOO!  A pox on your attitude, ma'am.

I'm Tempted, Really, But...

So, a regular customer who's been trying to get my number and take me out since I started working at The Club invited me down to Miami (all expenses paid) with him for the weekend.  From his 2 phones to his fat stack of cash composed of old $20s and $50s from the '90s, he screamed "DEALER!" but he's sooooo cute.  I was really kind-of tempted to be like "okay, when's our plane leave?"  But... (1) I don't want to get caught in some drug scheme, and (2) I don't know him from Adam and sex is NOT a glimmer of a possibility.  So yeah... no.  But I was REALLY tempted.  He's cuuuuute!

QUOTE OF THE NIGHT:

Customer to me: 

"I'm gonna call you Bohemian Mami."

LOL!  I love it!